TOO HEALTHY!
I meant to write this post a while back, but alas.
Those of you who know my life well presently, know that one of my main sources of income comes from working as a server.
Yes, I am a health coach, but sometimes I encourage customers to order more so that I have higher sales of food and drink on my tabs.
Anyways. I noticed this trend happening a few months back…
Say I was verbally pitching a daily special with some sort of vegetable component. Despite the fact that this dish probably has loads of rich ingredients (like butter, cheese, oil) guests would sometimes loudly respond to my description with,
“Too healthy!!”
Usually followed by a scoff from the speaking guest and laughter around the table.
I think the first time it happened, I found it funny.
People who come to the restaurant are often visiting Chicago on vacation or on their way to enjoy a day at Wrigley. I thought to myself, they were just having a good time...but then it happened again, and again, and again. Then I started to think about people I knew in my own life who would say something like that. Maybe you have someone in your head right now, who comes to mind.
I think that oftentimes when people don’t understand how to eat healthy or are insecure about their own health, they find ways to actively make fun of or shame wellness culture. They also justify bad eating on holidays or vacations with the idea of food tradition as a crucial part of celebration, and food traditions that are generally not the most health sound. (How appropriate to discuss it in this season!)
Similar to the concept of “skinny shaming” those who (by my definition) “health shame” can make others feel that they are not “living life the right way” or “being fun” if they aren’t participating in certain indulgences. Ironically the same people who health shame are usually the ones most insecure about their own diets. Perhaps, they are unhappy with their inability to grasp a nutrition routine that sticks. Maybe they simply don’t know how to eat well and don’t know where to start. The reality is, if you are a person who actively health shames, you are probably not reading this. The title would have thrown you a loop! Instead, since you are reading this blog, you are probably someone who has experienced this from a friend, a family member, a coworker, a significant other, etc.
How should I respond?
Unfortunately people are pretty stubborn when it comes to their belief systems and even more stubborn it seems if it’s rooted in a sort of ignorance to fact. It’s not likely that you’ll be able to turn them around, but there are a few things you can do if you find yourself in a situation that makes you feel uncomfortable.
Politely stand up for yourself
It’s your body! A polite firmness usually helps lower any comic relief the “health shamer” is seeking out of their attack on you.
2. assure them that you (actually) are happy with your decision.
Maybe even explain to them how a healthier choice makes you feel. They might be interested in listening even if they claim they are not.
And in the instance that the rant continues and becomes unbearable…
3. Kindly , let them know that you don’t disrespect their choices!
They are likely trying to reason with theirs. Nicely ask them to leave yours alone.
I thought this might come up during some holiday bonanza over the next few weeks…
Just a nice reminder.
If you’re at a party and there’s pie, and you want pie, eat the pie!
If you’re offered a sugar cookie and you don’t want the sugar cookie, you don’t have to eat it just because “it’s festive.”
Just along the same lines as the idea that you don’t have to cook or bake certain things just because they are deemed traditional to the celebration, all traditions began at some point. With that in mind, you can always start a new one right?